Nepotism

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)— Offering a stunningly blunt appraisal of the North Korean leader, Jared Kushner said on Tuesday that Kim Jong-un was a “totally unqualified person” who attained his position of power only through nepotism.

“Here you have a guy who has no government experience, and he’s in charge of the whole thing,” Kushner said, in an interview with Fox News. “It’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard of.”

Kushner noted that, instead of working his way up and acquiring the skills necessary to do his job, the North Korean leader had been given huge responsibilities and power “only because of family connections.”

“There’s only one word for that,” he said. “Nepotism.”

Nepotism

Hack Florida

Oh, teh stoopid – it burns!!!!

Last year a hacker in Florida revealed security vulnerabilities in one county’s elections web domains, so election officials could fix the problem. Naturally, instead of repairing their sites they elected to have the hacker arrested.

David Michael Levin, owner of Vanguard Cybersecurity, was arrested after the Florida Department of Law Enforcement received a referral from the Lee County Sheriff’s Office detailing Levin’s naïve attempt to thwart election fraud by exposing the online vulnerabilities.

Levin spent six hours in jail, held on $15,000 bond. He now faces three counts of gaining unauthorized access to a computer, network, or electronic instrument — despite the fact he had not only been doing his job, but also alerted the county to a potentially serious security concern.

All we can say is when exposure of a crime is treated as a criminal act, you are ruled by criminals.

But then…you already knew that, n’est-ce pas?

Hack Florida

From a seed to a ho

Cleverly subversive...or not

There is an entirely different order of product being developed here, far beyond the outer reaches of irony. I first started seeing them in Google Image searches; the most random queries were returning pictures of t-shirts, trucker hats, and especially ties that were truly uncanny. One could not, by looking at them, decipher how they had come about, what possible thought process lay behind them, who they were for, or why anyone would want them. They had something akin to the lost-in-translation weirdness of Chinese Shanzhai culture, but what was being lost was in a language far more distant than Chinese; one got the impression the “designers” of these pieces were speaking strictly in ones and zeros. I had visions of design-bots, data mining for user patterns, instantaneously designing products based on trending search queries, generating t-shirts like predictive text and graphics through some kind of visual auto-tune. Amazingly, it turns out I am not totally wrong.

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