Category Archives: ¡Pendejo!

Nuclear Apocalypse

Of course a Democrat prepared the nation for what a pompous ¡Pendejo! of a ReThug…er, I mean… OMP might do:

Among the greatest foreign-policy dilemmas faced by former President Jimmy Carter is one that has never been publicly aired but is gaining new relevance. It concerns nuclear war, and how the U.S. government would survive it. Carter’s decisions remain classified, but documents newly declassified by the CIA, along with the archives at several presidential libraries, provide a new window into the White House’s preparations for an imminent apocalypse.

Today, such an apocalypse could be triggered by any number of nuclear-armed states, including North Korea and Pakistan. During Carter’s presidency, such anxieties were focused squarely on the Soviet Union. It was during that period that military planners in both the Soviet Union and United States began to grapple with what until then had been an unthinkable heresy: abandoning the Mutually Assured Destruction catechism that had governed global order since the 1950s and preparing for surviving an all-out nuclear war.

Carter and his White House were interested in more specific questions. If the presidency could survive after a nuclear war, what exactly would it do afterward? How could the surviving commander in chief be identified? Who would identify him? How would he fulfill the three main functions of the presidency: to be the chief executive of the government, the head of state, and the commander in chief of its armed forces?

Carter’s answers came in the form of Presidential Directive 58, which was issued in the final months of his presidency; Ronald Reagan amended those plans with his own presidential directive in 1983. Their contents inform the continuity of government plans that remain in effect for the Trump administration. They have been the object of a multibillion-dollar pastiche of programs and a magnet for conspiracy theorists around the world.

The rest of the article is fascinating and certainly worth perusing, if only for the links to original source documents. 1

Nuclear Apocalypse

Show 1 footnote

  1. If you’re asking yourself “Why hasn’t this directive been declassified by now”?, shame on your blindness. No, it’s not because the Russians, Chinese and North Koreans would then know our plans (they already do), it’s because the residents in the area the government would be secreted under would mightily object; you might be obtuse, but it wouldn’t take them 3 seconds to figure out the Russians, Chinese and North Koreans would lock on to the underground bunker with their nukes, thereby guaranteeing the unprotected civilians above instant karma. A row would be raised…

North Korea MOAB?

Saturday is April 15,  the 105th anniversary of the birth of Supreme Leader Kim Il Sung, North Korea’s founding father, as well as sire to Dear Leader Kim Jung Il, and grandfather of noted basketball fan Kim Jong Un, the latest sadistic psychopath tyrant of that impoverished and barely extant dictatorship.

North Korea has traditionally used the date as an excuse to parade their latest weaponry before the world. Indeed, NK has long planned to present its latest in ICBM technology.

However this is a bonus year! That’s right, NK monitoring service 38 North states: North Korea’s Punggye-ri Nuclear Test Site: Primed and Ready.

Woo hoo – party!!!!

Because OMP is still peeing his pants over dropping The (Pen)Ultimate Bomb on a mountainous cave system in Afghanistan.  1 Major wood, y’all! AND AND AND!!!!! If OMP drops another MOAB on NK AND NK fires back with nuclear missiles AND China and Russia nd Japan and ROK also get involved, why, those pesky investigations of Russia’s involvement in OMP‘s presidential campaign just goes away!

AND AND AND AND!!!!!!!! VP Pence is set to arrive in Seoul on Sunday. If the timing is just so, he can huddle with the other survivors…

But, hey! No real worries. We dispatched an aircraft carrier and a small armada to cruise the Korean waters since Tuesday. Also? We’ve got literally dozens of military aircraft on Okinawa, just a quick Jet-Ski away.

Several leakers Benedict Arnold’s intelligence officials relayed to NBC News that should OMP the Pentagon become convinced North Korea is about to follow through with a nuclear weapons test, the US will launch a preemptive strike.

Fun times, kids! One day we can look back on this and tell our mutant offspring that this was the day WWIII started…

Wake up, people.

North Korea MOAB?

Show 1 footnote

  1. The US military claims they killed 36 ISIS member…with a $16 million bomb. That’s around $444,444.444.44 a person. You can understand why the military loves ’em; they’re big AND cost effective!

The Spicer Bunny

The Spicer Bunny

The Spicer Bunny


It is worth noting, daily if needs must, that people who hate the idea of the government itself never do a good job of governing.

This is true regardless of function: health care, budgets, (not) war mongering or putting on an Easter Egg Roll.

The annual wooden eggs were only ordered this past Monday, and shaved down to half of the customary order.

No “A” list stars will be in attendance, just a military band. 1

Even the Easter Bunny will be a lying, hackneyed, past his prime political failure.

Mean! (Sad!)

The Spicer Bunny

Show 1 footnote

  1. Because the United States Marine Band just screams Easter! In fact, it’s the only reason the little tots ever deign to step foot on the White House lawn.

Beeeel-yuns!

The GOP widely hailed vote by the House of Representatives on Sen. Ryan’s American Health Care Piece of Shit Act has been postponed, ostensibly until midnight, but in reality, perhaps forever.

The move comes as a firm 30 GOP members have publicly stated they will cast ‘No’ votes, with over a dozen other ReThugs also strongly leaning towards uttering a dreaded (in this case) “Nay.”

While some observers feel the additional hours will prove insufficient to change enough minds, the White House seems oddly sure they can swing enough votes back their way. Many of those same observers are befuddled; what does the White House plan – to buy the necessary votes? 1 2

Beeeel-yuns!

Show 2 footnotes

  1. Paging Rep. Nunes, paging Rep. Nunes; please call 1-917-756-8000 or 1-646-736-1779 before midnight tonight. That’s 1-917-756-8000 or 1-646-736-1779 before midnight tonight. Please mention the Denis Voronenkov offer.
  2. Also? What are the odds (5 to 8; beeeel-yuns to doughnuts?) that the ReThugs push this magic moment off until the wee hours of Friday morning, amend the shit out of the current bill (By stripping federal health insurance requirements for basic benefits such as maternity care, emergency services, mental health and wellness visits. Or worse. Woo Hoo!) such that is screws everyone, and then quietly pass it and all fly back home before the dailies can give it complete coverage? Pretty good, ya think?

Trump Resigns?

From The Independent:

Donald Trump is going to “get himself out of office soon”, a leading Democratic senator has claimed.

Dianne Feinstein suggested the President would quit before he was potentially forced out of office after anti-Trump protesters in Los Angeles demanded to know why more wasn’t being done by Congress to remove him from office.

Hinting she might know more than she is able to let on, Ms Feinstein, who sits on the Senate Judiciary Committee, replied: “We have a lot of people looking into this. I think he’s going to get himself out.”

She went on to cite several potential conflicts of interests surrounding the Trump business empire, but she declined to say whether she thought the President had done anything that was worthy of impeachment.

“I can’t answer that right now,” she said.

Don’t believe it.

We want it to be true, it should be true, and OMP’s behavior nigh on demands it be true…but OMP’s ego won’t allow it.

The only possible way OMP would walk away is if a bonafide genius deep within the rank bowels of the GOP crafted and executed the perfect long game: convince OMP to front for the candidate you actually want 1, select that politician as VP when you win 2, then pay off OMP with some dirty Koch brothers cash to to shamble off into early senile dementia back in Trump Towers, which he would never leave, drawing those golden drapes hard against the light of his detractors, while sitting around in a golden bathrobe and watching his fingernails grow to ridiculous lengths. 3

Fucking genius.

However…what are the odds, n’est-ce pas?

Besides…while you might remove the symptom, you’d be left with the root cause – that noted god-botherer and woman hater Mike Pence. 4

Careful what you wish for, kids.

Trump Resigns?

Show 4 footnotes

  1. That no one in their right mind would ever vote for, not a chance in hell, no way, no how.
  2. And if you don’t win, you’ve lost nothing, really: What was your other choice – Cruz, Rubio, Bush Litest?
  3. And after witnessing the mid- to later Reagan years, we have to say the OMP is exhibiting every sign of it.
  4. As well as his chief lackey-in-religious-nuttery, Mike Pompeo, whose religion desires nothing more than the destruction of the Jewish state in order to bring about the Rapture. Yep, whack jobs, both of them.