Terrorist Sock Monkeys

Phyllis May of Redmond, Wash. says she is “appalled and shocked and embarrassed all at the same time” about the incident that happened on Wednesday.

May has a small business selling unique sock monkey dolls. She says she and her husband were on their way from St. Louis to Sea-Tac and she had a couple of monkeys and sewing supplies with her in a carry-on bag.

“His pistol was in there,” she says of the sock monkey “Rooster Monkburn,” a take-off on John Wayne character “Rooster Cogburn” from the film “True Grit.”

May and her husband were going through the screening process when she noticed that one of her bags was missing.

“And the (TSA agent) held it up and said ‘whose is this?’” she said. “I realized oh, my God this is my bag.”

May said the TSA agent went through the bag, through the sewing supplies and found the two-inch long pistol.

“She said ‘this is a gun,’” said May. “I said no, it’s not a gun it’s a prop for my monkey.”

“She said ‘If I held it up to your neck, you wouldn’t know if it was real or not,’ and I said ‘really?’” said May.

The TSA agent told May she would have to confiscate the tiny gun and was supposed to call the police.

“I said well go ahead,” said May. “And I said really? You’re kidding me right, and she said no it looks like a gun.”

“She took my monkey’s gun,” said May, who has retained her sense of humor.

Terrorist Sock Monkeys – what will the TSA come up with next? 1 2

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Show 2 footnotes

  1. Actually…the whisper stream has it that the TSA — in conjunction with the CIA, FBI and several Wottsamatta U alumni — are the true force behind the MCI one-terminal conspiracy; Kansas City’s Mayor James is just a sock monkey in the e-vil plot.
  2. I will take a pic and post it later of the inch and a half working antique one-shot pistol I own. It would easily take out an eye though I doubt much more damage could be done; the ammo for it — should you find casings small enough — is barely larger than the tip of a sharpened pencil. I would also note that this actually LOOKS like a working gun, not something a sock monkey would carry. Which means of course that TSA would let me onboard an airline with it…

3 Replies to “Terrorist Sock Monkeys”

    1. On the other hand it’s a wonderful demonstration of how the English language changes. I propose we add the following adage to the American lexicon:

      “As stupid as a TSA agent with a sock monkey.”

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