Barty Crouch Jr

The Astas love the Harry Potter mythology the way most  Americans adore war.

At the Charles manse we have the complete (EXTENDED INTERVIEWS and EXCLUSIVE EXTRAS!!!) DVD set. Saturday evenings usually find the Astas engaged in a tense ‘rock, scissors, paper’ battle over which of the films to rewatch for the umpteenth time.

This past Saturday ‘paper’ and Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire won out. And so the girls cheered Harry and Cedric as they chased through that beastly maze. There were quiet tears at Cedric’s death. Again…for the upteenth time.

What brings this to mind is the role that Barty Crouch Jr played in the devilments of Goblet of Fire. Nefarious scoundrel that he is, Barty arranged events such that Harry was brought to The Dark Lord, Voldemort himself. Much of the trials and troubles encountered in the film could easily have been avoided had folks remembered that Barty Crouch Jr had one distinguishing trait: his tongue slithered in and out of his mouth when he lied, which was, of course, pretty much whenever he opened his mouth.

Had the gentle folk of Hogworts paid the least attention to “Mad-Eye” Moody, perhaps Cedric would not have died (again…for the umpteenth time.)

You can see the telltale tick below – it’s not like it’s subtle:

The forces of All That’s Good and Right with Wizardry eventually tumble to Barty’s deception and set things right — at least until the next film!

Yet Goblet of Fire leaves a few loose ends.

One is never exactly sure what becomes of Barty – was it Azkaban for him then? Maybe, but if so he must have escaped, for isn’t he wreaking havoc in the climatic battle of Deathly Hollows?

It’s been a number of years since I read the Harry Potter books to the Astas – I don’t recall whether Barty’s slimy thread was properly tied off or not. My assumption has always been that The Dark Lord subsumed Barty in one fashion or another.

This Week with George Stephanopoulos yesterday morning made me realize how wrong I was.

Barty not only managed to escape the final conflagration of Deathly Hollows, he went underground to plot more mischief. Then, somewhere along the way, he absconded with John Kerry and — using the infamous polyjuice potion — again began creating terrible trouble. But this time the danger is not just to Hogwarts – it’s to all of us.

Witness Barty’s lying tongue flicks in John Kerry’s mouth over Syria and abandon all hope. 1 2

This won’t end well (again…for the uimpteenth time.)

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Show 2 footnotes

  1. The fun doesn’t really get started until the 2:00 mark, but then doesn’t seem to end.
  2. However, maybe it’s simply tardive dyskinesia, or just the beginnings of early-onset dementia.

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