The Iron Throne is a monstrosity of spikes and jagged edges and twisted metal. It is uncomfortable, and the back is fanged with steel which makes leaning back impossible. Aegon I had it made this way deliberately, saying that a king should never sit easy. King Aerys II Targaryen, the “Mad King,” was always cutting himself upon it and it is said that the throne itself has caused the deaths of several people…
Whoa! How cool is that, right! Makes you want to run right out and get one of your own.
So, of course, now you can.
- Well…plus $1,800.00 shipping and handling ↩
- My gast has officially been flabbered. Really? Seriously, what kind of buffoon would dress up in faux medieval costumery, complete with honed replica broadsword, and pretend to be King HighAndMightySuchAndSuch while sitting in their 30K ‘throne’? Hell, what kind of doofus would even own said costume, much less a replica ‘sword’? My guess is it would have to be a terminally single, perhaps even serially divorced, certainly overly-involved in speculative fiction, socially awkward male, probably someone who does IT work, though not much past the Tier 1 HelpDesk level. Throw in some OCD or a touch of Asperger’s and you’ve just described (at least) 50% of those in the IT business. Although none of them would command anywhere near the salary necessary to make the iron Throne their own…. Probably a dozen equally socially retarded millionaires will end up ordering the thing. ↩
- Were I to blow 30K willy nilly, my choices would be substantially different; maybe start with an Obamaphone, add a new hobby, then return (this time with Nora and the Astas) to the most beautiful spot in the world. ↩