Bluck!

YawnHOLLYWOOD – In a move hailed by industry insiders as “oh thank fucking jesus!”, HBO yesterday euthanized the lame Dustin Hoffman trotter LUCK.

It is with heartbreak that executive producers David Milch and Michael Mann together with HBO have decided to cease all future production on the series LUCK.

We are immensely proud of this series, the writing, the acting, the film-making, the celebration of the culture of horses, and everyone involved in its creation.

Quote from Michael Mann and David Milch: “The two of us loved this series, loved the cast, crew and writers. This has been a tremendous collaboration and one that we plan to continue in the future.

The David Milch-created horse track series burst from the gates with a Michael Mann directed first episode but soon lost heart and faded rapidly down the stretch. Script doctors, who spoke on condition of anonymity, said “There was simply no hope. The pacing, especially the scenes with (Dustin) Hoffman, was turgid. Really, there was no saving it – we had to put it down.”

Dustin Hoffman, as erstwhile Club Fed resident now intent on becoming Mr. Big of the race track scene, flitted like an annoying horsefly throughout the series’ other more compelling narratives, landing now and again to take painful bites out of the show’s pace, turning a planned thoroughbred into a halting nag of a show.

Nick Nolte, though long past his prime stud fees days and usually considered (when thought of at all) as put out to pasture, was quietly loping through the show to a probable Emmy nomination. Also highly praised, and sure to soon find work again, was the steam constantly rising from nearly every horse on the show.

“When you consider how often steam is in a scene? With almost all the horses, well…all I’m saying is, that’s acting. And, get this – for scale! No big bucks,” said the show’s second Best Boy. “Amazing craft.”

No word from HBO on what will fill the empty time-slot., though unnamed sources have reported that HBO is back in talks with the producers of Bored to Death.

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2 thoughts on “Bluck!”

    1. I dropped HBO when they dropped Bored to Death so my knowledge of the series is strictly second-hand. However I’m predisposed to hate it because HBO dropped BtD. As far as dead animals, don’t know; i was usually baked when i watched the show…

      All’s not lost however; if you’re a fan, try this link.

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